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The Minefield

January 30, 2009
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How do these things happen to me?

Today I was in a rush to get out the door to take Hannah to an appointment.  I didn’t have my shoes or socks on yet.  The dog was lying in the middle of my pathway (because that is what she does) and without a thought or even a close look I stepped over her.  My foot–my BARE foot–landed in something kind of…well…squishy.  Playdoh kind of squishy.  I took another step to get all the way over the dog and when my foot landed again, the squishiness was still there, obviously now stuck to the bottom of my foot.  So I inspected.

Poop.  There was poop on my foot.  Some animal had left a pooplet nestled into my carpet and I stepped on it with my BARE FOOT.

As I’m standing there going “EWWW!!!  EW, EW EWWW!!!” the doorbell rings and there is the TruGreen guy wanting to kill errant yard weeds, which is pretty much most of what exists in my backyard.  I am hopping around, trying not to rub my poopy foot on the floor, hollering for Hannah to go to the garage and get a rag and some pet stain cleaner.  I hobble upstairs and scrub at the bottom of my foot with scalding hot water and soap.  By the time I get downstairs Hannah is standing there helplessly with a red t-shirt rag (to clean light colored carpeting) and is telling me she doesn’t know what cleaner I am talking about.  I run out to the garage and grab the goods myself, run back in and scrub at the squish spots, wash my hands and buzz out the door, hoping TruGreen man wouldn’t come in and steal all the silver.

Actually, I don’t have any silver.  But it sounds good, doesn’t it?

My suspicion is that the culprit was Agent Mooshie.  As I mentioned here, that cat is not the brightest crayola in the box, and he’s been known to wander around with a dingleberry now and again.

All I know is that I was, and remain, totally grossed out.  I stepped in poop in my own living room.  GAK!

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. Alan permalink
    January 30, 2009 10:32 am

    Oh…this made me laugh…and it’s my carpeting that has (had) poop on it!

  2. Judyhoo permalink
    January 30, 2009 11:10 am

    This is too funny!!

  3. January 30, 2009 9:49 pm

    Don’t you love when pets get dingleberries and either drop them somewhere or drag their butts on the floor until they smear off?

    • heysparky permalink*
      January 30, 2009 10:04 pm

      Oh yes. I live for it.

  4. Rich permalink
    February 2, 2009 11:38 am

    I didn’t know there was an official term for “poop hangers on”. Dingleberries is a much more refined term. (Added after laughing until the tears were dripping off my face!)

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