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Grill talk

March 17, 2012

Life can be complicated at times.  That is why I like to keep the simple things simple.  For me, toothpaste is simple.  I just want something without fluoride that leaves my mouth feeling clean.  If it’s cheap, then that’s all the better.

Welcome to why I’m a fan of Ultrabrite.  Cheap and minty and does a decent job.  Simple stuff.  I likey.

Now, I have no idea what possessed me to complicate something that was already just fine.  Why try to fix something that isn’t broken, you know?  Maybe it was just that I’d noticed that my teeth seemed to be a bit more yellow than I last recalled.  I’ve never had really super white teeth, thanks to all the antibiotics I sucked down as a young child to keep the constant cases of tonsillitis at bay.  But I think that the few cups of coffee I’ve been drinking every week have been making them rather dingy.  I wasn’t overly concerned.  For that matter, I figured I may be imagining it.

But there in the toothpaste aisle, surrounded by a bewildering array of gels, pastes, stripes, sparkles, anti-cavity, anti-plaque, anti-tartar, anti-gingivitis, anti-sensitivity, anti-halitosis, whitening, brightening, fresh mints, clean mints, bright mints, sweet mints, peppermints, vanilla mints, orange mints, spearmints, and bubblegum-flavored oral hygiene products, my little eye started to wander.  And it fell upon a small box that made some rather amazing claims.

It claimed to remove up to 90% of stains in 14 days.

It claimed to strengthen and rebuild enamel.

It claimed to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

Ok, not that last one.  But the other two for sure, right there on the front of the box.

That last one would have been cool, though, wouldn’t it?

The one thing I wasn’t crazy about was the anti-cavity thing.  It had fluoride.  If you research fluoride a bit you find it’s not quite as wonderful as it was once purported to be, so I simply prefer to avoid it whenever possible.  But still…90%.  Even if a good deal of the yellowness was in my tooth enamel instead of on it, if the toothpaste could do half of what it said and take away 45% of the staining, that would be pretty remarkable and probably worth some fluoride, right?

So, even though the Ultrabrite was less than a dollar, and even though the shiny little box was either two and a half bucks (or maybe it was three and a half, I don’t remember for sure).  I picked up the shiny little box and put it in my cart.  I picked up the Ultrabrite, too.  Just in case.  I was feeling extravagant about my dental hygiene that day.

That night I broke open my shiny little box that contained the tube of Crest 3D White Advanced Vivid Enamel Renewal Toothpaste (for real, that whole thing is its name) and tried it out.  Nothing too amazingly remarkable in that experience.  It was a minty toothpaste with a blue stripe that made me foam at the mouth like a rabid dog.  Anytime toothpaste can provide some fun, it’s a plus.

But then I kept using it.  Every morning, every evening.  And by the end of one week I could easily declare a verdict on the stuff:  it really works!

I don’t expect movie star white.  My basic enamel isn’t like that.  But to be perfectly honest, this toothpaste has gone far above and beyond my hopes and expectations.  My teeth are much more than 45% whiter.  I’m not sure I’ve ever seen my teeth look this white.  And unlike the time years ago when I gave whitening strips a (minimally successful) try, my teeth haven’t become overly sensitive in response to the whitening agents.  I am really amazed.

Crest isn’t paying me to tell you all this.  Crest has no idea who I am.  But in a consumer world full of false and misleading claims, it’s nice to know that there are products on the market that actually do what they say they’ll do.  For me, this is one of them, and since I figured the Sparky Nation likely heavily consists of coffee and tea drinkers, secret smokers, and people who suck on Sharpies all day long, y’all might want to know about this.  If you try it out and get similar results all up in your grill, let me know!



One Comment leave one →
  1. Joann permalink
    March 22, 2012 10:59 am

    I’m telling you that Heather and I have been using this toothpaste since it came out. Matthew refuses, says to just buy him the cheapest and it’s fine. I love it. Holly started using it this week and her teeth are beautiful! I know what you are talking about completely!

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