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Recuperation, not re-cooperation

January 13, 2014

I am slowly—very slowly—slipping back towards normal life.

Please do not ask me to define normal.  There’s no reason to have you doubting my first sentence by the end of my third, ok?

Today I haven’t used any crutches or taken any pain medication even though I’m still hobbling and am not exactly pain-free yet.  The low grade fever that popped up on Saturday was gone by this morning, and it’s stayed away thus far.  I am claiming these as indications that Sparky-style normalcy is somewhere on the horizon.

I cannot, however, explain why my right hand is so blasted cold, or my nose or my toes.  Perhaps the better question is why isn’t my left hand as cold as my right one (or my nose or my toes)?

I also find myself suddenly tired for no reason and sleeping for very long spells.  It’s not like I’m expending a lot of energy beyond sitting around and healing.  But it happens.  I can be sitting somewhere feeling fine, and all of a sudden, BOOM!  I’m tired.  I suspect that, along with the fever that visited, has to do with the general anesthesia.  It’s weird stuff and it takes a little while to get it all out of your system.

All these things are getting better, but they don’t alter the fact that I have to change my expectations of myself.  What I’ve been experiencing isn’t my new normal.  This is a temporary abnormal, and instead of adjusting with permanency in mind, I have to adjust so as to go with the flow until the flow stops flowing.  That means saying no to things I might be capable of doing so that I can be better assured of really being able to do them later.

This is difficult for me and probably part of what got me to this point in the first place.  I often feel pain and think it means “push harder!” when in fact most of the time it means “stop it”!   A good trait if you’re some highly trained professional athlete, but rest assured, I’m about as coordinated as a tennis shoe in the dryer.

I’ve got a couple of weeks to get this rest and healing thing down.  Is that enough?  Heavens to Mergatroid—I have no idea.  But the only way to find out is to employ it as such and see what happens.  That also means I have to learn how to push enough to strengthen without also tearing down and undoing healing.  I certainly don’t want to have to repeat this procedure simply because I didn’t care for myself well enough after the first one.

It is possible, I hear, to not learn these things the hard way.


9 Comments leave one →
  1. Joann permalink
    January 13, 2014 9:44 pm

    See, I, unlike you have no problem not doing. I have a problem with doing. I don’t know which is worse…

  2. January 13, 2014 10:52 pm

    Sounds like you just had surgery. It will take some time to get back to normal. REST! Take care of yourself and allow yourself to heal. Hope you are well soon! You will be in my prayers. :)

    • January 13, 2014 10:53 pm

      Thank you! Yes…arthroscopic knee surgery to clean up some shredded cartilage.

  3. January 14, 2014 9:31 am

    Lisa, the truth is as a person gets older, recuperating gets stranger… and it takes longer. I hope you continue to heal without any setbacks.

    • January 14, 2014 11:42 am

      “Recuperating gets stranger…” Hahaha! I can testify, for sure!

  4. January 14, 2014 9:45 am

    Okay, I’m talking to the Father on your behalf, but Lord! You said “coordinated as a tennis shoe in the dryer” and “Heavens to Mergatroid”–I have no words. I so love you!

  5. January 14, 2014 8:10 pm

    Any kind of surgery takes a toll on the body and it takes a while to recover. One step at a time and do what you can. Rest, rest, rest. This is a good time to be still and know that God is God and hang out with Him more than usual. But then, you already know that….;-)

    • January 14, 2014 9:14 pm

      That’s the plus time of this, definitely. :)

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