This ball is really rolling.
I alternate between wanting to jump up and down squealing hysterically, and wanting to hide in the closet and take deep breaths into a paper bag. The former generally wins out, but I’d be lying if I said the latter didn’t occasionally have its moments of temptation.
And this is why: I’ve been accepted as a member of the ministry team for the Lighting Fires trip to Brazil with Global Awakening Ministries, led by Randy Clark and Tom Jones.
I typed that so calmly. You know…like I go to Brazil every other week, I do this sort of thing all the time, no big deal.
Except I’ve never been to Brazil, or anywhere in South America, for that matter. I’ve never gone on a trip like this alone, not knowing anybody at the outset, not knowing what to expect, not knowing how to prepare, not even knowing where all the financial provision will come from.
This is easy stuff for God. But it’s a Big Deal for me.
Last August I was leafing through a brochure about upcoming ministry trips with Global Awakening when I came upon the page for the Lighting Fires trip. The Holy Spirit lit that baby up like the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree. I knew it was an invitation, a whispered offering of adventure with Him. But then came January, and knee surgery, and what has felt like a mountain of obstacles.
Like the obstacle of the cost of the trip. It’s currently estimated to be $3500. I don’t have that waiting in my bank account. It will have to come from sources prompted by Him to invest in this, invest in the kingdom, invest in me.
He reminded me that I raised more than that for Project Jubilee. Which is true. Like, over $1600 more.
But then He said something to me that sucked the air out of my lungs.
You believed Me to raise that money for the good of others, but you don’t believe I’ll do the same thing for you.
And I could not argue. He was right, as He always is.
Lord, help my unbelief.
I decided then that I only had one legitimate option: press forward. Every excuse to do anything else meant tolerating unbelief. I had to move in the opposite spirit, and let Him move in His own way.
So here I am. I have 16 days (July 21st) before I need to mail all contribution checks to Global Awakening. I am setting my face toward September 25, when I board a plane for Brazil. I have a lot to do before then, but He’s not only the God of finances, but the God of time and energy. He can make this work. There is no good thing that can come of choosing to entertain anxiety over the unknown. Choosing anxiety means missing joy.
And I don’t want to miss a thing.
I need some help. I need people who pray, people who give, people who encourage. If any of those categories describe you, then I need YOU.
You can get details about the trip and what I need by commenting on this post. I will send you the email that many other people received tonight. Or you can search Facebook groups for “Adventures in Brazil!” and ask to be added. I will gladly do so. The Facebook group is a good place to hear up to date information about what’s happening and also stories about what I experience on the trip.
This adventure isn’t just about me. God has hungry kids in Brazil. He does amazing things for them, things we don’t see so often here in the US. Blind people see, deaf people hear, tumors disappear, sicknesses flee, crooked limbs become straight and strong. I want to see what He’s doing. I want to participate in it. And I want to bring it back to benefit all who come in contact with me. I don’t know what all that means, but, well…that is my blank check to Him.
Only seems right it should go both ways.