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Tilt and spin

April 20, 2019

Life is full of interesting experiences, but not all of them are experiences I care to repeat.

Two days ago I woke up as I normally do. I checked the time, then rolled over to get my bearings before getting up. When I did that, the entire planet tilted off its axis and refused to un-tilt.


From that point on, every little movement set off extreme spinning, and extreme spinning set off nausea. If you want a scientific analysis, I will simply tell you that this registered approximately -46.8 on the Fun-O-Meter, give or take a couple wooden nickels and an unmatched sock.

I’d never had this happen before. Oh, sure…I’ve stood up too quickly and gotten hit with a little wobble, but this wasn’t that. This was full on carnival ride spin, but there was no greasy tattooed man with a cigarette dripping out of his mouth for me to signal to let me off this crazy thing. Fortunately, because my brain is a junk drawer full of odd and ends of “hey, this could be useful some day” information, I knew there were physical therapy moves to alleviate vertigo. I looked them up on YouTube and halfheartedly gave one a try, but I was really feeling too dizzy and sick to do it properly. After a couple of hours, it was obvious this wasn’t going to just go away. I knew I was in over my head and signaled my distress to Mr. Sparky, who graciously came home from work to give me a hand.

Several Epley maneuvers later and the planet was still doing The Wobble. The next day we switched to the Foster maneuver, which seemed to correct the side we treated but also set off the other side in the process. We repeated it for the newly affected side. Vertigo gone, but now I was experiencing a whole new realm of equilibrium disturbances caused by having pollen-cranky inner ears upside down for prolonged periods of time, and it was almost worse than the vertigo. I was bent on attending a wedding later that afternoon, and thanks to Mr. Sparky and God (and a dose of less-drowsy motion sickness medication, although less-drowsy than what I can’t say), I did exactly that. Then I came home, slept well over twelve hours, and woke up pretty much fine.

*insert Happy Hallelujah dance*

I seriously hope I never repeat that experience. But truth be told, it’s how I sometimes experience our current culture. It’s as if somehow the planet shifted off its axis and everyone has gone dizzy in the brain, and I am constantly dodging folks who can no longer think in a straight line. Gravity becomes intermittent, and critical thinking and common sense have gone spinning off into space.

I have no stones to throw. Surely I’ve been there myself, temporarily lost in the centrifugal force of The Crazy and waving at the Martians on my way to dance on the rings of Saturn.

But wisdom.

I’ve found myself fascinated by what scripture says about wisdom. I’ve been slowly making my way through the book of Proverbs using The Passion Translation, not just reading it, but reading it with Holy Spirit and giving Him permission to interrupt my progress and tell me things I don’t know. The book of Proverbs is good in any translation, but I like how new language can give me new ways to think about a thing and open my mind to receive new revelation about a thing. In this case, that thing is wisdom…God-sized wisdom based on a perspective vastly superior to my own.

So here’s to the wisdom of positioning. Here’s to my mind being set on things above, my tush being seated in heavenly places, my feet being set on a Rock higher than I, my eyes being set on Jesus, and my heart being set on God’s goodness, glory, and promises which are beyond my ability to fully fathom (but I’m gonna give it the ole college try anyway!).

And here’s to my inner ears staying clear of anything that doesn’t belong in there. No more endless rides on an invisible Tilt-o-Hurl.

May it be so.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. April 21, 2019 11:20 pm

    My head’s spinning with this one! Had to chuckle while reading that commercials for some casino gadget were introduced several times. So glad all turned right-side-up for the wedding! You looked beautifully normal. Loved your HS wisdom thoughts! He’s Something Else!

    • April 21, 2019 11:23 pm

      He surely is! I’m so glad He’s smarter than I am and willing so share His smarts! I’m also glad I’m no longer spinning…it was pretty awful!

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